It has been quite the busy week, full of meeting people and making new friends, as well as navigating myself around the general area surrounding me. Eating relatively healthy, I like cooking food with lots of vegetables in it, and have only eaten instant ramen once (even then, I had it with spinach, beefsteak and an egg).

The barbecue I mentioned previously was very good, I made four new friends, two of whom I am especially solid pals with. Their names are Ginnie and Connor, the former being in the same illustrating class as me, the latter being a second year in a digital medias course. Spent a lot of time that day just talking our heads off about all kinds of things, which was good fun, and turns out, we've got quite a lot in common! Tomorrow evening Ginnie intends to be going to a drinks night at the student bar, and I am not that great at handling such environments, so Connor and I will be spending the evening watching Doctor Who in his room (his favourite television show, of which he knows a LOT about). He is also aware of Tumblr Culture, evident by my greeting him on that first day at the barbecue with "I like your shoelaces". For those who know what I mean, it puts the fear of God into them. It's awesome. I've also made friends with some folks in my illustrating class, those being three chaps called King, Chloe, and Ayesha, all of whom are very fun :-D Tomorrow is to be our first proper class together, and we have been instructed to bring our laptop computers into class. Welcome to the techworld, everyone.

Yesterday I met with Tsuki, and it was really nice to see her again, even if I've only been away for a week. We ate at McDonald's and I ended up choosing a sandwich that gave me sweaty hands and a real jittery uncomfy feeling, the McSpicy. I will NEVER in my life eat that thing again. Eventually the misery passed and we wandered around the shopping district, and stared wistfully at the games they had in the second hand computer store. It was a good trip! --Sumi 24/09/2023


Wow, what a DAY. It was my moving-into-dorms day today, and here I sit typing away in my new room. I'm wearing my favourite pajamas, I have a teapot full of night-time tea, and the light above is soft. There's still more than a week until our classes actually start, so I've got a lot of downtime. Dinner was nice, I cooked arroz amarillo and had it with corned beef. Tomorrow I'll soak some beans in the morning so I can use them for later. My housemates seem nice, a little shouty and boisterous, but very decent folk. They seem to enjoy my bug facts, which is always good to hear! Mum wrote me a letter, which was really nice to read through, and I will keep it on my desk always. Tomorrow there is to be a sort of meeting-new-people barbecue just outside the halls, so I'll be doing a lot of socialising, I expect. I'm getting pretty sleepy, so I'll finish my night-time tea and then get ready for bed. --Sumi 16/09/2023


Today I feel like talking about cold weather, and why I love it. I don't really have a set plan for what I'm about to write, so I expect the structure will come across very loose and strange, but I guess that's how it is.

When autumn turns to winter, it grows older, colder. I say goodbye to the sun earlier than I usually do, and by suppertime, he is already fast asleep. In my country there isn't much snow, but there is plenty of rain and wind. The wind feels like it bites at your face, like it's chiding you for not wrapping up properly. It pricks its icy pins across your forehead and down the bridge of your nose, and all up in your cheeks. Would you call me a masochist for liking how it hurts?

Thick scarves that wind around your neck, the tassles on the end are perfect for fidgeting with in your hands. Soft wool of any colour you like, smelling like dust and home. Big heavy coats. My dad's leather coat, he bought it when he was younger, away in New York for a holiday. It feels like it weighs a hundred pounds over my shoulders, pressing me down into the earth. Now I'm more grounded and connected with the pavement than ever before. It's got deep pockets and thick fur lining inside, so you'll never feel the rain seep in. I fell asleep at a friend's house once, and had the coat draped over me through the night. It was one of the most refreshing slumbers I've ever woken from.

People love beverages this time of year. Piping hot mugs of coffee, paper cups filled to the brim with scalding tea. I see them spilt on sidewalks sometimes, those splashes of brown in all different shades. I hope those few sips tasted good to whoever drank from them. Hot chocolate is particularly good with cinnamon powder, or cherry syrup, if you can find it. It makes me rather sleepy, though. The cold makes me sleepy. I could curl up in my bed, protected by the layers of blankets like sediment on the ocean floor. So long as my arms are tucked inside, nothing can get me. Oh, it's so lovely. So very very lovely. --Sumi 10/09/2023



Got a dentist appointment today, costs quite the bit nowadays, but I guess it can't be helped. Listening to Limp Bizkit's Greatest Hitz CD on my new music player, "My Way" and "Boiler" are awesome songs. I might make a webshrine for the band later, they're so cool. Less than two weeks till I move out now, and I'm really looking forward to it...I can cook the kind of food I like, including stuff with loads of vegetables (Dad prefers meat) and legumes. I can decorate my room the way I it to look, and I can finally jack off without the worry that someone's gonna burst into my room and tell me to take out the trash, hahaha! Maybe that's a little too much information though.

My joys about autumn coming back were short-lived though, for we've got a sudden heatwave just now. Dad says that it's what they call an "Indian Summer", but this certainly ain't India as far as I'm aware. Today's going up to 93 degrees, which probably doesn't sound like much, but I HATE hot weather. It's so bright and sweaty and I never have energy to do stuff, yuck. Not to mention, the people in my country are so fuckin' braindead they'll take any chance to go outside and sunbathe, even if it means getting burnt all over their pasty backs and shoulders. Going outside only to see the fattest white dudes with red skin, lying face down in the yellowed grass like corpses, really isn't a pretty sight. But I guess it makes them happy. Better for them to do that than yelling at immigrants, right? --Sumi 06/09/2023


IT'S AUTUMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Goodbye summer, you are the most wretched season of all, your only saving grace is my birthday, farewell to you. I just finished a quest on RuneScape so I'm feeling pretty happy about that. The dungeon towards the very end was terrifying, but it didn't take very long to escape it. Only a few more weeks till I move out now, and I'm really looking forward to it, even more so now that I've discovered my campus has a free gym.

I went to a museum in the fancy part of town today, and saw all sorts of things, of which I took photographs of. My favourite part was the bug room, though it was pretty lackluster and kept veering off into some section all about crustaceans, which was weird. Even still, there were some awesome little guys in there. Dead little guys, but awesome nonetheless. There was also a HUGE room filled with taxidermied birds, including a recreation of a dodo, as well as birds like the bald eagle and this one particular bird of paradise with really long and shiny head-feathers. Apparently, it can control the feathers, a bit like Entrapta and her hair from She-Ra. That room was really crowded though, so I couldn't spend a lot of time in there.

Most interesting of all though, was the exhibition about the history of humanity, where they had a whole load of skulls and bones from prehistoric humans and their ancestors. There was a life-size model of a neanderthal man, depicted at only a few years older than me, but he looked like he was in his fifties. Strange part was that he just looked so much like some regular guy, save for the fact he wasn't wearing any clothes. His eyes were so lifelike, it was one of those moments where your brain goes, "ah, a person!", despite the fact that it was straight up just some recreation of a guy who's been dead for thousands of years. Oh, well. I suppose that's just the way we are! --Sumi 01/09/2023

24TH AUGUST 2023

Just finished playing some RuneScape, it's pretty late here, nearly midnight, but I'll write a little bit before heading to bed. I've got a weird mix of days lately, some which are good, some which are neutral (like today), and others which just suck total ass. A few days ago my mother stressed me out so much, I bit my arm real hard in front of her (???), as if it would accomplish something. Looking back I'm pretty sure I did it just to try and convey the stress I was going through without having to speak, but it felt really, really outta character for me. And now there's a weird bruise on my arm where I bit myself, uh oh! I'm surprised they never put me in the special needs classes when I was in school, hahaha.

In the last few days, I've been considering whether I want to terminate all my orthodontic treatment. For those folks at home who haven't yet seen my gloriously handsome face, let me fill you in! To summarise 20 years of medical issues, I was born with something called a unilateral cleft lip and palate, which is when the two halves of the face don't join up all the way while you're in utero. This essentially causes a kind of cavity in the nose and mouth area that needs to be fixed up with surgery, if you ever hope to speak and eat properly (both of which, thank god, I can do to perfection). I've had all the functional surgeries done, but there's a whole list of cosmetic surgeries ahead that people can choose to take, because it still kinda messes up the way you look. For example, I've got a pretty big underbite, and a really flat nose, but to be honest, I don't really care about getting it "fixed". Sure, there are days when I get insecure about it, but I know that all the dumb jaw surgeries and rhinoplasties and lip corrections just aren't worth it. I've been told they hurt like hell to recover from, not to mention all the psychological effects it has on your idea of self-perception and all that. There was a time during my adolescence where I totally HATED how my face looked, and how I wanted surgery no matter what the consequences were, but I've grown from that. Maybe I'll regret it when I'm older, maybe I won't. We'll just have to see how things turn out, y'know? All that angsting aside, I should get around to phoning up the orthodontist. Yuck. --Sumi 24/08/2023

19TH AUGUST 2023

Had a pretty nice week. No drama or big stress, just smooth relaxing and having fun. My sister and I went to go visit my grandma at her house in the seaside town down south, we spent three nights there. We went on the boardwalk by the sea on the second day, the rides are pretty expensive nowadays...but we did have french fries! The day before we left was the most awesome, because we went to a butterfly farm and saw SO many beautiful little bugs. From what I remember, there were a lot of swallowtails, blue morphos, some caligo owl-wing butterflies, a HUGE Atlas moth, as well as this bright orange one called dryas julia. There were even some caterpillars, which were so small and so damn cute. We went to the giftshop after, where I bought about ten postcards and best of all, a framed and real-life (well, it's dead) caligo memnon butterfly. It set me back the equivalent of around 4000 yen, but it's so worth it. I have it propped up against a wall in the living room, and I can see it from where I'm sitting right now. Maybe I'll start a collection of framed bugs, though I'll have to get an income again if I want to do that, because those things certainly aren't cheap. Oh yeah, the young geese around my house are familiar with me enough to eat from my hand now. They go crazy for oats and mealworms, and the parent geese don't even hiss at me anymore. I feel like I've made a friendship with them, even if it is food-based.

Today was nice and chill, I didn't go outside, but I was still quite productive, for I've sewed up an old jacket. It used to be a boiler suit last year, but I turned it into an overcoat, and now a light jacket. The fabric's a nice olive green, and made of good sturdy cotton. While I was sewing, I was jamming to a Green Day CD, and my new Korn CD, on my dad's big stereo. They're both pretty cool bands. At some point, I'll sew some pockets into its interior lining, but I've had my fair share of needlework for the next few days. Tomorrow I'll be out in the city, meeting a couple friends from my highschool days. We're going out for Korean BBQ, despite one of them being a vegetarian, and the restaurant seems to be a real good one, all authentic and all that. It's less than a month till I move out now, so it'll probably be the last time we all meet up for a while before going back our separate ways for college and stuff. About a week ago, I went out shopping for all kinds of things I'll need for college, like cookware and bedsheets and towels. I hope to be a real put-together sorta fellow when I'm living in halls, certainly not the ramen-eating filth-dwelling student stereotype. I do enjoy ramen, but it won't be my main source of nutrition, that's for sure. Monday will be a busy day for me too, since I'll probably be cooking dinner, and I also have to return a library book, and book a dental appointment too. My orthodontist wants to fix stuff up, so I need to get a whole tooth removed before I see him next!! Yeowch!!

To end today's entry: Man, I wish I had facial hair. I'd look so fuckin' cool. --Sumi 19/08/2023

10TH AUGUST 2023

I am no longer a teenager. How in the hell did that happen?!

Feeling kinda scrungy today, and I suspect that the pot of tea I had at a local cafe is to blame, it was probably overflowing with caffeine. Listening to the Beatles again, this time on Spotify, for someone's compiled a list of all their slow and laidback songs. Not much to write about today, to be honest. I might work on my other website for the time being...--Sumi 10/08/2023


Some pretty cool things have happened in the last few days. As I sit and write today's entry at my desk, I am comfy in my navy pajamas, drinking a delicious taro milk tea with grass jelly and nata de coco, listening to the "A Hard Day's Night" album by the Beatles. My favourite song on that album is definitely "If I Fell". It's so soothing, and the harmonies are so nice!

On Saturday, Dad's friend Joe, Mum's friend Otis, and my friend Zahra all came to lunch at our house, for Dad hosted that day a "Threads" watching party. It was the most miserable film ever and I wish never to watch it again, but at least my friends were there! Dad made the most excellent vegetarian quiche, because Joe is vegetarian, and it had onions and spinach and thinly sliced mushrooms, with TWO blocks of comte cheese (the real fancy stuff that's even better than Gruyere), and we served it with charcuterie and various other sides, like a buffet. Joe brought an apple tart and some fancy wine, and Otis brought some snacks from the Japanese food retailer he works at. One of them was called "Curry Beaver", and it took me a lot of willpower to not make a crass joke about it. Okay, listening to Sugababes now. I know, it doesn't really sound like it's my style of music, but it's nostalgic stuff! I never listened to them when I was younger, but I remember hearing stuff like Sugababes being played at school discos and summer fetes and such.

Yesterday was a real thrill. I woke up at 4AM, really needing to pee, and it took me a little while to fall back asleep again because I was so freaked out by the film from the night before. But the real highlight? At approximately 13:00 PM, Dad and I went to that tattoo parlor I mentioned before, and as of 17:00PM, I was walking back home with the most wicked ink on my forearm, just above the triforce one from May. It is SO COOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! --Sumi 07/08/2023


This morning I woke up at 9AM, which is about at least an hour earlier than usual, because I set an alarm last night. This day is going to feel extra long, but not in a bad way. In a little while, I'm gonna phone up a tattoo parlor in the next town over and ask if I can come book a consultation to get a new design on my arm. I've designed it up already, and it's the sickest thing ever: the tower from St Mystere in the first Professor Layton game. It'll take up my whole outer fore-arm, but not a whole sleeve. Then later today, at around 4-ish, I need to go to my mother's old workplace to pick up some kimchi a colleague made for her. I feel like an errand-boy most days, running about doing stuff, but there's nothing else I really do during the day, so I don't complain about it. One month and a half from now, I'll be in the northern part of the city, finally moving out and away from the boringness of this house!

Oh yeah, my dad's been pretty hopeful lately too. Some big oil company are interviewing him to maybe get a job, and they pay BIG BUCKS, about 3 times what he currently earns at the very least. I won't say much about it, but my dad's been saying that if he scores this job, it'll mean he'll have to move overseas, and out of the house too. I think it'll be a good chance for him, not just the money, but the chance to experience something new and refreshing after these shitty last few months.--Sumi 03/08/2023

26TH JULY 2023

I'm SO full of sleepy tired right now, it's not even 9PM yet but I'm SO sleepy! I just did a big yawn :P It's been about a week and a half since my last entry, and boy howdy, quite a bit has changed. Well, my daily routine hasn't, but my state of employment has, for I quit at the health foods store after suddenly shout-crying in my boss's office, which was kind of embarassing. Lots of stuff from the last couple months just piled on top of each other and I didn't have an emotional outlet for it, I guess. All I can say to summarise it all is, I'm really looking forward to moving out at the end of the summer. Regardless of who ends up living in the same halls of residence as me, at least I'll be putting some distance between myself and all the nonsense that goes on here at home.

I've been writing down a list of stuff that I should buy before I move out, like cookware and cutlery and other such stuff. All of it added up together might be a little expensive, but I have the disposable money for it these days. My goal is to try and buy as little from IKEA as possible, and see if I can get most of my stuff from second-hand stores, for two reasons: one being that it won't be so harsh on my wallet, and the other being that hopefully most of what I find should be of much better quality than the mass-made stuff you get in IKEA. There's also quite a bit from home that I intend to bring with me. When the time comes for me to start packing things up, I shall have to get those big cardboard boxes you find in warehouses. --Sumi 26/07/2023

14TH JULY 2023

Nothing much to say today, except this: I'll bite the kneecaps of any tech-loving loser who thinks to any degree that AI "art" is on the same level as real human creation. I've been working so hard to get to where I am, and I need to work even harder to get to where I want to be in the future. There's no way in hell I'll ever let people say that my art is worth the same, or LESS, than the shit that gets churned out by mindless computers with no understanding of soul and emotion and the very human desires to create. FUCK those people. --Sumi 14/07/2023

13TH JULY 2023

I tried to record some of my banjo playing, but there is straight up nowhere in this apartment where I can do that. My sister says I can't record in our room because she's on a voice call with her friends playing videogames, and my parents are always in the living room or kitchen. God I'm really looking forward to September, when I can finally get out of here! I'll miss being able to have a bath every evening (the student halls only have showers), but at least I'll finally be paying my own rent, for a place that I can chill in and record however much music I want without worrying about anyone else.

I stayed at home all day today, having gotten out of bed around half past 11 AM. I usually don't rot in bed for so long, but after yesterday's closing shift at the mall, I guess I kinda needed it. Nothing too crazy happened at the store yesterday, but my shift felt like it was dragging on forever. Seriously, is it even healthy for the human body to work 9 hours straight? Maybe to the average adult it seems pretty standard, but from the perspective of someone who actually cares about the limits of his body and brain, I think it's just cruel to make people work that long, doing something they don't even like. For real, I'll bet there's only about three people in the world who ACTUALLY like doing customer service, and they clearly must have some kind of brain disease. On a completely different topic, I've been wondering whether I should change the theme of this site or not. It's really cool as it is, but in terms of readability (is that even a word?), having bright yellow on top of dark purple probably ain't all that good for the average netizen's eyes. I've also been wanting to add a thing where I can have music playing automatically in my homepage, but I have no idea what I need to do to get that. Maybe I'll try and figure it out with a little research after I'm done writing this entry. --Sumi 13/07/2023

11TH JULY 2023

Last couple days have been pretty chill, thank the stars. Two of my friends came to visit me after my shift at the mall, and we hung out around the grounds and had Taco Bell for dinner :-) I go insane for the concept of CrunchWrap Supreme. I would gladly give my soul up for those things! Which reminds me, I've been considering maybe getting a melodeon with my next paycheck at the end of the month. It's a diatonic button accordion, and the one I've been staring wistfully at through various sites is a 2-voice D/G tuned one with a black varnish. Only trouble is, they're crazy expensive, way more than the stick dulcimer and even more than my banjo.

My previous entry was pretty heavy, but I'm glad I got it out of my system. --Sumi 11/07/2023

7TH JULY 2023

I hate this stupid house. The only person I can tolerate most of the time is my sister because she never gets under my skin or complains about anything. Both my parents never shut the fuck up about each other and they ALWAYS ALWAYS come bitching to me about some retarded fucking argument they had earlier in the day. And this happens nearly every day. I'm not their damn therapist, I'm their kid, and I wish they'd just fucking zip it or at least go to marriage counseling or something, but with the way things are, they probably won't. If it carries on like this for however long, I doubt they'll still be together by the end of the year. They say they love each other, and sometimes it shows, but most of the time it's like they're both walking on eggshells around each other. I feel like that too, I know I love them because duh, they're my parents, but sometimes I just can't wait for September to roll around so I can finally move out of this place. It's always "blah blah blah oh Sumi it's like your mother just worries way too much and she's SUCH a hypochondriac, clearly it's all in her head", and "nantoka kantoka oh Sumi-chan I wish your father would just understand, he's so cold and callous and critical about everything, what a chode" and I just hate hearing it! And now my mother doesn't have a job because she's sick, and my dad's always working at home, I never get time to myself. EVER. Going outside provides temporary relief from the misery at home, but even then, I'm not really alone, because I'm with the rest of the world. I just miss the days when I was still in highschool and both of my parents would be working in their offices, and I'd get home from classes early and have those precious few hours by myself where I could do whatever I pleased. Don't give a fuck about how I am at work anymore, I hardly smile at customers and they don't take offence to it. So long as I'm polite and do my job properly, it's all cool, even if I have to deal with the occasional asshole or two, because at least they leave the store and never come back. I always go home at the end of the day and it's the same stupid shit over and over again. Autumn come quickly, save me from this misery! --Sumi 07/07/2023

25TH JUNE 2023

I feel hollow today. Probably because it's a Sunday, but also because my home life hasn't been the best lately. I'll be out of the house by September, but I've still got a couple months left with my family. At least at college, I'll finally get a break from the suffocating tension that seems to linger in the atmosphere of this tiny apartment.

My mother's got some mystery illness which can't seem to be diagnosed, either because the doctors aren't taking her seriously, or because she's really paranoid about it. That in itself is fine, but my dad really, really seems stressed out about it. He has to now balance his crazy work schedule alongside my mother's health issues, and I get the feeling that he kinda resents her for it. We're going to go outside in a little while; I think he wants to vent about it to me. Which is fine, I guess. I remember about a year and a half-ish ago, my mother's menopause really flared up, so they were arguing a lot back then, and my dad offhandedly mentioned to me that he was considering divorcing her, which made me pretty sad. To be fair to him though, I also kinda sorta think my mother is a tiny bit of a hypochondriac. But I would never say that to her face, because it would upset her too, and she's been having a rough time with her health as it is. Urgh, it's all so conflicting and it makes me just feel empty. It's become really easy for me to just lie down on my bed and stay there for a while, and maybe fall asleep. But there are good things coming, I hope, so it's gonna all be worth it in the end.

My friends are done with college for the year, which means we'll get to see more of each other again!! On Wednesday I met up with some of them at a park in the city center, and we had a grand old time :-P We played card games and videogames on our 3DSes together, ate gyros, and caught up with one another about how we were, and made a casual joke about that whole group of dumbass billionaires in the ocean. Turns out they imploded, by the way, so there's probably a load of guts and stuff strewn across the ocean floor, each with a net worth of more money than I'll ever see, hehehe. Man, that's a fucked up way to die. But it was a swell day regardless of the misery happening in the Atlantic Ocean, and we'll all be hanging out a few more times through the course of this summer. Life isn't so bad, and neither is the weather! Reminds me of that song "Blue Skies" from the Betsy musical. Blue skies, smiling at me....nothing but blue skies, do I see... --Sumi 25/06/2023

8TH JUNE 2023

Yeah, I've been slacking on this site for a while now. Stuff's been happening a lot, but also, it's pretty much the same! I'll just write down what's been swinging in one big paragraph, so I can get it all out, hehehe. Listening to Seepage's "Break Me", reminds me of the stuff I used to dig in my angsty teen days.

In early May, I visited some pals at their college halls in a city a few hundred miles over, and it was wicked fun. We cooked, went shopping, goofed off, and all around had a good time. Best of all was the tattoo I got, it's a small triforce on my left forearm, just near where my wrist cuts off. Link is left-handed, and so am I, and I'd rather not have a tattoo on my actual hand, so this is the next best place. Maybe when my birthday rolls around in the proper summer, I'll get another tattoo to make it less lonely B^). My boss at work has reduced my hours to around 16 per week (as per my request), so I'll have more time in the following months to sort out upcoming college stuff, as well as focus on my art more, since I've been stuck in a big block for quite a while now. It also means I won't have to deal with the general public as much as before, too! AND I've been building up a new website on the Net lately, a more professional-style one for when I eventually become a worker, and people can see the art I make, and maybe commission me to make stuff for THEM. Later today, I'm probably gonna visit the corner store to get some ingredients for something called "battery acid spaghetti", a concoction of energy drinks and sour gummy strips that is said to be nearly radioactive in taste and appearance. I also got my hands on a copy of Pokemon SoulSilver earlier this week, so I'll play that later today too, maybe while I sip the Drink Of All Evil. --Sumi 08/06/2023

26TH APRIL 2023

I haven't written on this site in a little over a month. I don't have much strong desire to update this place lately, but maybe the motivation will come back sometime soon. The trip abroad was awesome, though. We stayed at a relative's house and met with other relatives and old friends, ate all kinds of food, and bought a lot of souvenirs, and went to so many places in the city. I will elaborate more on this trip in one of my future entries, since it deserves a whole log of its own, hehehe.

On a slightly more sad note, my main intention for today's entry was to just get out some thoughts about this gap year, and friends, and university and such. I hardly talk about negative things on this site, since I don't want it to become one of those miserable things that depressed people make to try and cope with stuff (though I've been in a similar spot in previous eras.)

It's so lonely here. I have friends, of course I do, but I hardly ever see them, since they're all away studying in faraway cities, and it gets busy around this time of year with exams and all. I don't consider any of my colleagues as friends, even if they're the people I talk to most frequently outside of my family. They're nice, but I don't feel the need to be around them and spend time with them. But then again, I'm sure most people have that attitude towards their coworkers too. It's silly to complain about stuff like this, given that I straight up chose to take this year off, but every now and then I find myself wondering whether I regret it or not. Making cash is nice, and I'm sure there are people who would envy the wages and solitude that comes with this year off, but I haven't felt so lonely in a while. Even a couple years ago, arguably one of the worst eras of my life ever, I didn't feel lonely. I was in highschool back then, so I saw friends every day, and we stuck to each other like glue.

But it's a hard, achey sort of feeling to see your friends moving forward and doing all kinds of fun university things, making progress in their lives and accomplishing things, while you sit doing the same old daily routine like an old pensioner. Loser-esque as it sounds, on rare occasions, I worry that maybe they see me no longer as a very close friend, and more like an older friend that they occasionally make communications with. But to me, they're still my newest friends, and will be until I hopefully get back into university lifestyle in this coming autumn (so long as the university accepts me). This ache will pass, as all things do, but when you're going through such things, it can sometimes feel like quicksand, keeping you stuck in one place. Frankly, I'm not very used to being alone all the time, even though I'm never alone at home (though that is another can of worms for another day, that again, will be thrown away once I move out for university). I do miss socialising with the fun folk. --Sumi 26/04/2023

22ND MARCH 2023

Less than TWO WEEKS till the holiday, and it's all I ever daydream about now. What I'll wear on the plane, what we'll do when we get there, what we'll eat, where we'll go...it's just so damn exciting. Something I'm looking forward to in particular is a photo-shoot that one of my relatives is setting up for us, to be done at one of those professional studios as a coming-of-age ceremony of sorts. I'll be wearing an heirloom dress (even if it's traditionally for girls), and all of my family will be dressed to the fuckin' nines. The whole thing's mostly for the joy of my grandma over there, since it means a lot to her that the dress gets passed down through the generations.

I've been getting sick quite a bit, even though we're only three months into the year so far. Hopefully it's just the shitty cold weather doing it, and that there's nothing up with my immune system. I was sick in the very beginning of the new year, if you can recall in my older entries here, and then I came down with Covid towards the end of February, and now I'm recovering from yet ANOTHER cold which hit me in the last few days!! Jeez!! At least I have it now, and not before we go off on holiday. That would really suck. It would be nice if more people would just wear masks outside in this country, but the stupid Western standards seem to totally neglect any idea of self-preservation and being considerate to others.

In fact, maybe I'll rant about that whole thing now. People here where I live (a big city, of course) are getting more and more inconsiderate of the people around them, ESPECIALLY on public transport. On the buses and trains, it's getting increasingly common to see/hear people watching their stupid videos on their stupid smartphones without earphones. You have to spend pretty much the entirety of your journey listening to some dumb techno song through shitty speakers, and people just act like it's normal now?? It's so RUDE!! If I think that the person isn't much of a threat to me, then I'll tell them to wear earphones or turn the sound off, because nobody else does so. It's all TikTok's fault, really. That app is a genuine cancer to society. It's ruined the brains of so many people, especially in my generation, so I always do feel a little smug about knowing how I'll never use it, and that I never have a smartphone glued to my side. Maybe that makes me sound like a bit of a douchebag, but I don't really care. It's a weird superiority complex thing I have about something that ultimately doesn't affect anyone but me, so it's not doing any harm to anyone. --Sumi 22/03/2023

4TH MARCH 2023

I haven't written anything on here for a while. To be honest, there's not a great deal to write about! Every day has some sort of routine now, whether it's work or cooking or something else. I seldom meet up with friends, since they're all away studying, but it's not too lonely. I've got a few close friends from the other side of the pond who I talk with a lot on Discord (known some of them for nearly six years already!), which is always fun. But that holiday overseas is getting closer with each passing day, so it gives me something to look forward to B) I really oughta make a proper list of what to take with me, and what to bring back to my homecountry afterwards.

Listening to Jean Ritchie songs now. I don't believe I've written about it already, but I got a stick dulcimer a couple months ago, tuned to D-A-D just like a regular mountain dulcimer, except it's thin and you hold it like you would with a banjo. It makes a good and clear sound, and is really easy to play songs on. I was gonna get an autoharp, but it turns out that they're REALLY expensive, close to about a half of my monthly wages, as such, the stick dulcimer was my next best choice, and it's real worth it. There's a few songs I'm quite decent with now, but there's still a lot more to learn. --Sumi 04/03/2023


I'm writing today's entry in a cafe, one of the fancy new-ish ones with exposed brick and hardwood floors, and it's got a decent connection to the Net, which is always a plus. I should actually be doing some online training courses for my job, but I got a little sidetracked (a pretty common occurence for someone like me...!). My drink is jasmine tea, which I thought would be pretty expensive given that it's from a high-brow place like this, but it cost me the equivalent of under three American dollars! Good thing is, I've got a whole week off of work, starting from a couple days ago. Not a holiday, but still! It gives me plenty of time to chill out and re-charge before my next shift next week.

AND!!!!! In exactly two months, me and my family are going to the other side of the WORLD to visit family.........I'm SO excited!!!! My brain's suddenly fizzled out so I can't really think of anything else to write about, which has been happening quite a bit recently, but oh well. I guess I'll write something better next time...! --Sumi 02/02/2023


Sundays are always busy at work, but I managed to do something I'm actually pretty damn proud of: I gaslit a customer. This is my magnum opus. My greatest feat yet. Nothing can top this. And if you sit down, allow me to divulge the true details of what went down...

Around the fifth hour of the afternoon, just a little while after I had returned from my scheduled break, came into the shop a customer garbed in a neon yellow t-shirt with the Playboy logo printed on top, and just underneath the logo, the word "Playboy" written in Japanese katakana. I cannot remember exactly why, but I was all of a sudden struck by the intense urge to make fun of it. And I must stress, I am very rarely a mean or mocking sort of fellow. But to laugh in the face of a customer would be unthinkable, and most assuredly against every line in the staff rulebook. Thus, I knew at once that I would have to pull quite the trick to make something work, as well satisfy that terrible mean streak in me.

Once the customer came forth to the till, and after I had scanned all of her items, I acted. Staring her dead in the eye, a mournful frown upon my lips, I cried aloud, "I'm so sorry miss, but that shirt doesn't actually say Playboy in Japanese!" The customer grew flustered, and responded that she had not known so, and spurred me to tell her what it actually said. Making up a new meaning on the spot was no easy task, but with the luck of the stars on my side, I managed to do so in a way that did not give away my true intentions. "It says 'collarbone'", I replied, my frown now changed to a self-deprecating grin. The customer laughed, seemingly embarrassed, and made one more quip: "Well, I got it off a shady website, so that's probably why!". After a final remark on how she would wear the "collarbone T-shirt" either way, she gathered her items and left the store. Okay, I'm done writing like some stupid fancy Victorian novelist. It was pretty funny, though, even if it is kinda pointless in the grand scheme of things. Anything to make the working day more fun for me, you know? --Sumi 29/01/2023


I'm gonna be working 8 and a half hours tomorrow, all the way till closing time. But Tuesdays never get very busy if we're lucky, so maybe it won't be as crazy. I watched the new episode of TLoU today, and holy crap, it just continues to amaze me. The visuals, the lighting, the acting, it's all just sublime. I won't write too much about it, since it's still an ongoing TV show at the moment, but you bet I'll write essays worth of stuff after the finale. Not much else to say today, to be honest. --Sumi 23/01/2023


I'm on holiday for a week, since it's mandatory before March comes around. I haven't had as much motivation or energy to put a lot of work into this site like I did the last couple months, but I'm definitely not letting this die out. It's too important for me to neglect!

Just a couple hours ago, I watched the first episode of the new TLoU television series, and it is fucking CRACKER. Pedro Pascal is the absolute best person to ever play Joel, and so is Bella Ramsey with Ellie. Through pretty much the whole episode I was saying, WOW THIS IS JUST LIKE THE GAME!!!! And Sarah's death was just as, if not even more, scary and intense as it was in the game. I haven't actually played the game, on account of my bad reaction times (terrible for playing action games), but I've watched a lady on Twitch play it. After some research as well, I've got a few theories as to just exactly how the cordyceps fungus would work in humans too. The real life ants affected by it aren't braindead, they're still conscious (well, as conscious as ants can be), which makes it all the more terrifying when you realise they're just puppets, aware that their sense of autonomy is being taken over by the fungus. And if we apply that same principle to the infected in TLoU, then that's really, really messed up. Oh, and I've got a couple days holiday left before I return to work again. I gotta use it wisely! --Sumi 19/01/2023


Seeing my friends was awesome. They're all college students, so I made sandwiches for them for lunch (probably the first proper meal they've had in a while, hahaha), and then we gathered in my room to chill out :) I introduced them all to "Lady", my 1880s sock puppet lady. I'm a bit tired now so I won't write much today...hehehe! --Sumi 11/01/2023


Happy New Year!! Rock n roll '23 motherfuckers!! Nothing much has happened so far, same old stuff as always. I came down with a pretty gnarly cold a few days ago, which suckerpunched all the energy out of me, but I'm thankfully recovering from it, and feeling way better now. My dad got a whole new stereo set the other day, since our old one was really busted up, and we've got a really good set of floor-standing speakers now. The first thing we played on it was the Blade Runner soundtrack, and man, it was crisp as all hell. Every note and every little thing just sounded so rich and smooth, it was awesome. I've got some friends from college coming over today, so my entry won't be too long. Maybe in my next entry, I'll write all about it! They're a real crowd I love them so much. If you see this guys, rock on!!!!!!! --Sumi 06/01/2023


Christmas has come and gone, and it was awesome. I've got quite a bit to write about, but it also feels like I can't think of anything to write about at all. I'll just write whatever comes to mind then, hehehe.

I met up with a pal from highschool on Christmas Eve, to catch up on everything, since they were spending a few days back up in our hometown (they study in a town down south). We hated each other like crazy back in highschool, but we've made HELLA amends since then. They're doin good, and so am I :) We got sushi together, which was pretty good. It was one of the few chain sushi places my mother approves of, anything like w*g*m*m* is pure fucken sacrilege. I got a couple things from a small department store, and then we parted ways. Since it was Christmas Eve, that evening, the whole family got together in the living room to partake in our family's tradition of watching "Muppets Christmas Carol". Objectively, one of the best movies of all time! And yesterday morning, I helped Dad with getting the Christmas dinner all set, like I do every year. We have a lot of small, set traditions in this family, like little routines. For gifts, I managed to get everyone what they liked, and I got one of the best gifts I've ever recieved: a 2-disc, 51-song set of Ruth Etting's famous tunes on CD :) I played it through the stereo before lunch, and afterward I ripped it onto my laptop, and synced it with my walkman. I LOVE Ruth Etting's songs, she's got such a nice voice. I can't sing in the same keys as her, since her voice is quite a bit higher than mine, but it's fun to try all the same.

Worked today too, one of the longest shifts. It felt like forever!! Of course, Boxing Day is hectic as hell, and where I work is no exception. IDK why so many people find it absolutely necessary to go crazy in malls the day after Christmas, but man, it was like a damn madhouse up in that store..My general consensus from today is that people will do ANYTHING to get in on the half price sales, even if it means dropping their own babies on the floor to search for their wallets. The baby cried a bit, but that's better than complete silence, I guess. We laughed a bit about it after, though. A lot of customers are just plain dumb as hell. --Sumi 26/12/2022


SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FRUCKEN!!!!!!!!!!!! SLEEPY!!!!!!!!!!! AUUUUUUUUUGHHHHH OUGHHHHHHH OUGHHHHHHH wauuuu....wauuhhh....goodnight, old pals. Soon I will be SO cosy in bed and ready to face tomorrow (Sparkle On Wednesday)! --Sumi 20/12/2022


I managed to overcome a pretty big obstacle earlier today. I told my boss I'm on the spectrum, and she took it a LOT better than I expected! Luckily, she's been very understanding so far, and even said herself that she figured I was somewhat bad at handling large social gatherings, especially the Christmas party last Sunday evening (a most intimidating event, it was!). On that same evening, I recieved a copy of Nineteen Eighty-Four, the novel by Orwell, from a colleague as part of the gift exchange. It was an awesome thing to read, no wonder it's one of the most famous books in history, certainly one of those books that give you a new window into the world. My main thing to take from the book though, is: Newspeak does sound like a very interesting way to condense the language. Not necessarily good, of course, but definitely a unique approach, more so than all these newfangled internet acronyms! I talked about the book with Dad for a while after I finished reading it, and he said he might get the movie version with John Hurt in it on video sometime soon, which will be good to watch :D Oh, and I got paid today too, which is pretty swell. I'll save it up for now, though. I'm not planning on doing anything yet. I've asked my parents that their gift to me this Christmas is money for a tattoo, so I shan't have to pay it myself, they get rather expensive, and their income is quite the sum compared to mine. I ought to settle on a proper design for the tattoo, too! It's exciting! --Sumi 16/12/2022


I've been doing a lot of Christmas shopping in the last week or so. So far, I've bought for my family: some skin lotion for my sister, a book on Impressionist art for my mother, and a book about jazz for my father, as well as a new crime novel for my grandmother (which I've asked the mall bookstore to stock for me). Once I get paid, which should be near the end of the month, I'll get some gifts for my friends as well. Last year I got one of them a Minecraft-themed math book, which they actually really enjoyed! I need to give him his clown statue too, which I bought a few months ago as a souvenir from a city down southwards, but he forgot to take it home when he visited a few weeks after. Listening to ABBA's early tunes at the moment, the song "Love Isn't Easy" is my favourite thus far. I need to do some prep for academic stuff soon, too........ough! Fare well for now then, I guess. --Sumi 08/12/2022


Listening to the tunes of Whispering Jack Smith as I write this entry for today, his voice is so soothing. Grandma's coming to visit again tomorrow, and we'll be having some soup I made earlier today for lunch. We all got her some gifts for Christmas, too :) I got one for my mom in advance as well, though it's nothing super special (freebie multivitamins from my job...don't tell her that!) Oh, and that date with that girl from yesterday wasn't so bad. We didn't do anything romantic and just kinda fistbumped each other at the end, which was probably a sign that we're not flushed for each other or anything. I don't know if I'm properly cut out for romance, to be honest. It's complicated stuff, and I'm pretty happy with just being the "funny sidekick" kinda fella, you know? Taking things seriously is difficult sometimes (not in a cringey batman Joker way though!!), so I just make funny puns and hope for the best, hahaha. I'm also considering making another website for me to talk about bugs and other things I'm passionate about. Maybe I can take sneaky looks at the CSS of other people's websites, since I'm not too good at building up my own. Is that a crime? --Sumi 02/12/2022


My job's going all cool, all smooth sailin' so far B))) I stopped using that dumb accent by the way, it got stale real fast. I've gotten a lot better at navigating the store now, I know where all the main things are. There's a few items we sell that are straight up impossible to find sometimes, but someone usually helps me out with it :P Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment, which means I don't have to help with morning stockups on the shelves, but I still have to do six hours in the evening :// Five days of work in a row, I can hardly catch a break!! All jokes aside, I don't mind the gig. I feel like I'm contributing to some part of society, even if I'm just selling suspicious vitamins to rich old men (they absolutely LOVE to buy "maca", which apparently helps sexual potency, like penis enlargement pills.). And on Thursday, I have a date with a girl I've been talking with for a couple weeks, and I'm nervous as HELL. She's suave and smooth with flirting and all that, which I'm the total opposite of. I'm pretty sure she's seen this website already, uh oh!! I don't even know what most "date protocol" is like, to be honest. Do I get her a gift or something? That reminds me, actually. I should really start getting gifts for everyone's Christmas this year..--Sumi 28/11/2022


Worked just 8 hours this week, but I'm settling in pretty well. Navigating the store is easy enough, though the specific items that some customers want are pretty hard to find sometimes. It's just trial and error though, I'll learn the details soon enough. Somehow I've managed to convince everyone that my natural accent is a super heavy Southern one, like I'm from South Carolina or something, and I'm not sure how I should go about it now. Maybe if I slowly wean myself and everyone else off of it like a meth baby, it could work? Switching so suddenly would raise eyebrows for sure. But I might just keep on at it anyway, it's pretty fun to practice, and I think it makes the old people feel more comfortable. Like I'm a character from the old Westerns they watched as kids, IDK. From 8 in the morning, too. At least it's the weekend now, so there'll be plenty of time to mellow out before. Unrelated, but I'm also considering growing my hair out. It's dyed black right now, so I'll keep on dyeing the roots if I need to. I miss having fluffy hair around my face, it's cosy. --Sumi 11/11/2022


I decided to check out that Filipino fried chicken branch that rhymes with "Golly Gee" today. There's been one in my city for the last four or five years already, and I've been meaning to go there for a while now, but I kept putting it off. Turns out, it's okay. Nothing special but it's definitely better than something like KFC. Hopefully the image I attached will load, so you can see it too. The chicken was really crispy but not as hot as I thought it would be (in terms of temperature). The fries were really good, and the gravy tasted a bit like Japanese curry, which was pretty neat. After I ate there, I went to a thrift store and found this cookbook from the 1970s, and of course, I had to get it. There's some really good pictures inside, and I'll definitely attempt some of the recipes too. I got that job at the health foods store by the way, but it's gonna be at the shop in the big mall in the suburb over. My commute will be a lot easier then, since I can just take a bus each way. Uniform's all black like in the Italian restaurant from before, but I don't have to wear a button down! I'll gladly take a plain old t-shirt and baggy pants over formal attire any day. So, we'll see how this new gig works :D --Sumi 06/11/2022


Halloween was quite fun, but rather uneventful, save for an interview I had at a health foods store in the next town over. Hopefully I'll get that gig. And I did end up dressing as Nepeta, but only for a little while! Turns out that gray paint really doesn't feel that great on my face, but the end result looked pretty awesome. I carved a pumpkin the day before, and I tried to get it to say "meow" with the shape of a cat on it, but I grossly miscalculated and it ended up saying "mow" instead :(( I'm cooking dinner tonight (palak paneer!), which is a great dish, and tomorrow, I'm seeing two pals for dinner and drinks, one of whom I haven't seen in over a year. I'm excited to see him again, he's had a bit of a rough ride last time I heard of him, but he's doing much better now. Okay, time to go switch the rice cooker on :-) --Sumi 02/11/2022


My grandma's coming to visit tomorrow, so I'll be making lunch (beef bourgignon, following the recipe by Delia Smith). My cookery skills are getting real solid now, if I do say so myself! And by the way, here's the link to the Barney hate website I mentioned a while ago. It's so funny, you get to shoot him with cannons and run him over with motorcycles.. I hope the link works, but if not, copying and pasting is easy. In three days, it'll be Halloween too! I've decided that I'm going to dress up as Nepeta Leijon from Homestuck; she's one of my all-time fav characters. I relate to her so much!! I bought a pumpkin a few days ago too, so maybe I can carve that on the night before Halloween. A couple years ago, some kids came around to trick-or-treat, though we haven't seen em since. Halloween isn't as crazy over here as it is in other parts of the world, but I still like to have fun with it anyways :D --Sumi 28/10/2022


Well, don't you know! The country's leader resigned a few days ago, making her term the shortest in national history (and she didn't even die at the end). It's anyones guess as to who's gonna be the next head honcho, but the current two leading candidates are both total grade-A douchebags with egos bigger than their giant fat mansions. I'm also considering adding a new section to this website for writing down all the recipes I dig. Maybe I'll follow that recent trend of writing down one's entire life story before getting to the instructions themselves, LOL :D --Sumi 23/10/2022


I helped save a snail on the pavement yesterday when it was raining outside. Its shell was kinda cracked but hopefully it isn't too much of an injury, and that it can recover. The little thing was right in the middle of the road, and if it stayed there I just knew it would get hurt, so I picked it up and moved it. I still miss my old pet snails, I hope some of them managed to thrive out there :( I've also deleted my Facebook account, because I've only recently come to the conclusion that having all your info out there for anyone to see, especially someone with a name as unique as mine, is actually pretty scary and invasive. So, I'm going back to theways of remaining as anonymous as I can, and I don't think writing about my duties as snail rescuer will give me away anytime soon, hehehe. --Sumi 15/10/2022


This is my first entry into this section of my website, and although I probably won't update it every day, I'll see if I can do so at least once a month. Structurally, this website is really starting to come together now and I've gotta say, I'm pretty dang proud of it so far, even if it's not the coolest site out there (the title of which belongs to a barney hate website hahaha). --Sumi 06/10/2022

Sumi's Site... From 2022 - The end of the world!